Strength

03/11/2020 8:54 p.m.

Meeting Mr Vincent Ng, a curator at A Good Space, was an insane, mind-warping experience. There was trust and patience built between us through the entire 3 hours we talked to each other. His journey hasn't been all that easy, he went through a lot going through JC and university but he was able to conquer it all, which was honestly, amazing.

He shared with me a lot of things, facilitated the conversation we had and the conversation within myself. He taught me things I did not know such as the different leadership styles one can adopt, and he normalized networking for 19-year-old individuals like myself. I gained confidence to reach out to people whom I really want to talk to after they have shared their stories online, as weird as it sounds, there are people who are willing to share with you their story and you just have to be Bold! Don't fear getting judged! Fear the opportunity lost if you did not choose to initiate to talk to those people who inspire you.

That night, I reached out to Faheema. I watched #SMUchangemaker, a Youtube video in which she was featured in. She is the founder of hash.peace, an organization which advocates racial and religious harmony, builds friendships transcending differences, counters extremism and most importantly curating cultural intelligence, as well as critical thinking. I really wanted to somehow and someway reach out to her but I obviously did not have the courage to do so. But after talking to Vincent, he really gave me the confidence to JUST DO IT. So, I did. I messaged her on Instagram and told her how inspired I was after watching her video. She replied to my message and even suggested to have breakfast together with a few others to share more about what hash.peace is all about! Honestly, I was just extremely shocked, at the outcome, the breakfast is not fixed yet, but I believe it is coming soon. I just can't wait what I will learn from the conversation and what I can bring to the table as well. Everything happened so fast. Exhilaration. Amazement. Overwhelmed. Hopeful.

After talking to Faheema, I clearly became more confident in reaching out to people who literally are role models to me or whose lives they are living are just so close to what I would want myself to be living in the future. I came across a podcast Youtube video featuring an NUS business graduate student: Leonard Yap. I connected to him on Instagram and I was really interested in the beliefs he held on to strongly during university and fortunately he was such a pleasant soul and he was so open to sharing with me his top three beliefs:

1) Be bold, be fearless and not let any person’s words affect what you are pursuing if you know that what you are doing is right. 

2) Be humble and try to learn as many things when you are younger. Talk to people, ask for advice and they would share more with you.

3) Tough times do not last but tough people do. Always remember that even though the problem seems big at first, it’s just temporary. The challenges may be insurmountable at that very moment. But now, in retrospect, they don't seem such a big deal after they are over and done with. It’s because tough times seems huge only when you are experiencing it at the moment.

He reminded me to stop comparing with other people around me because everyone is different! Everyone is unique! Most importantly, this one thing he told me really struck a chord with me: be ambitious but be contented too! I mean this has been something I was always struggling with since the start of I-don't-even-know-when. I always am so ambitious with what I feel I can achieve in the present and in the future, after all: dream big because if I were to shoot for the moon and I miss it, I will still be able to land among the stars. But for now, I won't settle for less, I know exactly what I am working towards and I know how to get there, the only thing missing right now is me actually doing it. I won't go all talk and no action, I am going to try my best and absorb so much from SMU that I am going to make my 15-year-old self quake. My 15-year-old self would never have imagined me even entering SMU business school or even graduating from VJC to even start off with! But I did the latter, I can definitely achieve the former too! So, for that, I am thankful for Leonard for really waking me up. Hui, quit wallowing in your own mindless thoughts, start being thankful and appreciative for everything from small to big. Things happen for a reason and you need to start becoming more contented with everything you have. You literally have everything you need in the world, you have all shelter and you have all the necessities you need to survive. Now, when you realise that you are good, start becoming more mindful about all the things around you, the loopholes in the society that you can do your part to fill up, the people around you that need help, help them. We can only rise by lifting others up.

Also, just three days ago, as International Women's Day.
This picture is literally everything. So powerful.
Happy International Women's Day.
Girls deserve equal pay. And,
Boys are allowed to cry.


xoxo, Hui

Trigger Warning

03/06/2020 4:59 p.m.

I was reading a thriller, crime, mystery book earlier today.
Dust to Dust, written by Tami Hoag.
The first chapter caught me completely off guard and I cannot even express how appalled I was by this.

"It is stunning how quickly it happens. How little time it takes to go from trouble to tragedy. Seconds. Mere seconds without air and the brain begins to shut down. No time to struggle. No time to panic even.
Like a boa constrictor choking the life from its prey, the noose tightens and tightens. It makes no difference what thoughts explode in the brain... The commands don't make it down the neural pathways to the muscles of the arms. Coordination is gone.
The sturdy rope makes a tearing sound as the weight of his body stretches it. The beam creaks.
His body turns slightly this way and that. The arms pull upward in hideous, slow-motion spasms. A macabre marionette's dance - arms moving up and down; hands twitching, twisting, bending; fingers curling. The knees try to draw upward, then straighten again. Posturing: a sign of brain damage.
The eerie contortions go on and on. The seconds stretch as the death dance continues. A minute. Two. Four. The rope and beam creak in the otherwise silent room. The eyes are open but vacant. Mouth moves in a final, futile gasp for air. The most acute, exquisite split second of life: the final heartbeat before death.
And then it is over.
At last.
The flash explodes in a brilliant burst of white light and the scene is frozen in time."

To read about how terrifyingly simple it is for life and its essence to slip through our hands as such makes me appreciate life even more. I think that every earthling brought into this world is a warrior and a fighter, just that most of us have not yet figure out how to channel the inner power we all possess to impact the world, to leave our mark.